Tuesday, September 15, 2009

In the papers today...

A British cop faces action for inviting women to have sex with him on his police motorbike. The cop, 43-year-old James Appi, posted pictures on a sleazy swingers’ website of himself straddling his BMW while posing next to President Obama’s limo. When questioned, he said that it was merely a fantasy and that he would not have gone through with it. However, upon further investigation, it was revealed that he only said that because the first offer he received was from Vin Diesel, who was researching for his new film Bike Boink.
This story reminds me of: Blane Fonda - Salacious Love (from Master of Stars and Broken Arms)

Bittorrent has been banned in the Antartica. The U.S. Antarctic Program announced that it has banned all peer-to-peer applications because of "the potential to overwhelm the internet connections on the Ice". This has incensed the citizens of the Antartica, and days later, about 200 polar bears staged a mass hunger strike when their download of Penguins Gone Wild got stuck at 93%. Thankfully, Al Gore intervened, and quicky delivered to the bears several cartons containing the desired DVD, complete with bonus features and flipper-fondling devices.
This story reminds me of: Sleeping At Last - Birdcage Religion (from Storyboards)

Saved By The Bell actor Dustin Diamond is being sued for over $21,000 in unpaid property taxes. According to RadarOnline.com, The 32-year-old, better known as Screech from the 90s TV hit, also had his car repossessed. This is not the first time that Diamond has been surrounded by controversy, and in 2006 he starred in his own porn tape called Screeched, aka Saved By The Smell. His manager later admitted the tape was released in an effort to raise his profile, but close friends say that Screech was only hoping to get Mr Belding to spank him one more time.
This story reminds me of: Twiggy Frostbite - I'm Still Here (from Through Fire)

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