The most rockin' song of all time (apparently)

The Onion AV Club must like pissing people off. They have declared Creedence Clearwater Revival's 'Ramble Tamble' as the most rockin' song ever. They qualified that statement with five prerequisites, namely:

1. It came out between 1955 and 1980.
2. It has to be bluesy, but not too bluesy.
3. It can’t be a classic rock radio staple.
4. It must make you drive at least 10 mph faster within the first 60 seconds and/or make doing the dishes fun.
5. You know it when you hear it.
   

That's pissy. If a song were really rockin' it would have way steeper requirements. Namely:

1. It came out of your momma's ass.
   
2. It has to save the cheerleader.
3. It turns your radio into staples.
4. It has to make you do the dishes while you drive.
5. You've never heard it in its entirety, cos 10 seconds in, you dash over to your neighbour's backyard, steal his Labrador and make labby stew.
   

In which case, the most rockin' song has to be...

Ok fine, maybe the dude's got a point.

Creedence Clearwater Revival - Ramble Tamble (from Cosmo's Factory)