Now I look down the harbor. All manner of boats, overloaded with fleeing population, pulling out from docks. Streets are all jammed. Noise in crowds like New Year's Eve in city. Wait a minute ... The ... the enemy is now in sight above the Palisades. Four — four great machines. First one, a tattooed bald headed mean SOB is crossing the river. I can see it from here, wading ... wading the Hudson like a drunken idiot that's had too many Snack Plates in a mosh pit.
A bulletin is handed me...
Tiger beer cans are falling all over the country. One outside of Tanjung Malim, one in Sentul ... Jinjang ... seem to be timed and spaced ... all in May to take over this country.
Now the first machine reaches the shore. He stands watching, looking over the city with a bottle of Bud in his hand. His bald, cowlish head is even with the skyscrapers. He waits for the other baldies. They rise like a line of new towers on the city's west side ...
Now they're lifting their hairy tattooed hands. This is the end now. Hair comes out ... black armpit hair, drifting over the city. People in the streets see it now. They're running towards the Klang River ... thousands of them, dropping in like rats.
Now the hair's spreading faster. It's reached Times Square. People are trying to run away from it, but it's no use.
They're falling like flies.
Sick Of It All - Step Down (from Scratch the Surface)
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If you've ever been the top boy in school, released a 9.0 rating record and get driven to work in a transformer where you have a Swedish secretary called Solveig then, like me, you'll never identify with b-sides.
The web is loaded with goodies. And pretty music-related goodies. And damn pretty music-related goodies. And OMG my momma's gonna buy me a mockingbird damn pretty music-related goodies. None of which even measure up to these.
Have you ever seen a four-piece college band playing 'Like a Virgin' in their Y-fronts, eating a KFC barrel each and doing tribal dances at the same time? Neither have we, but it should be funny.
Some things are better enjoyed in sixes, like beer or snowflakes or Petra Nemcovas, which need we point out is better than having just five Petra Nemcovas.
We recently felt obligated to talk to all the unhappy Sufjan Stevens fans on the street. We also recently felt obligated to eat a lot of fried chicken and steal ladies underwear.
Track 9 has to be the worst place to be on any album - not good enough to open or close or be in the first side or open the second. Here's to the underdogs of records everywhere. Or so you think.
Most people don't know that Bob Dylan is eating a karipap on the cover of his Bootleg Series. But we do. Because some things are just plain obvious.
Get To Know Your Pirates
Pantsy was once told by his pet gerbil, who was so piss hot she burned a hole in Pantsy's panties once, and then another time she wore this jock strap on the treadmill and... oh wait, she said something.
The Geek - one time Toho janitor and ex-student of Chuck Norris. Rumored to be the 'man-in-the-suit' for Moguera in 1994's Godzilla vs SpaceGodzilla.
Genusfrog is a well-travelled pirate among motorbike garages, invading Scotia freedom fighters, blue Gothenburgians and otherwise hard-to-get Parisian maids.
Buzz ... (radio static)
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